From a Licensed Educational Psychologist in California
Parenting doesn’t come with an instruction manual. Every child is unique, and while most will go through phases of struggle, sometimes those struggles feel bigger, longer-lasting, or just different from what you’d expect. As a parent, that little voice inside often wonders: Should I be worried? Should I ask for help? And if so, who do I even ask?
If you’ve had those thoughts—you’re not alone. In fact, asking for help is one of the most powerful ways you can advocate for your child. Here’s a friendly guide on when to reach out, who to connect with, and what steps can make things easier, written from the perspective of a Licensed Educational Psychologist (LEP) here in California.
When Is It Time to Ask for Help?
Kids all have ups and downs, but here are some signs it might be time to look for extra support:
- Schoolwork feels like a daily battle. Despite extra practice, your child still struggles in reading, writing, or math.
- Big feelings show up often. Meltdowns, anxiety, sadness, or constant frustration start to take over.
- Friendship struggles don’t go away. Your child is often left out, has trouble keeping friends, or clashes with peers.
- Behavior shifts feel “different.” You notice more defiance, withdrawal, or refusal to go to school.
- You have a gut feeling. Sometimes, you can’t quite explain it—but you just know something’s off.
If these patterns last more than a few months and are making life harder at home, school, or with friends, it’s worth checking in with a professional.
Who Can You Turn To?
Thankfully, you don’t have to figure this out alone. Here are the key people who can help:
- Your Child’s Teacher – They see your child in action daily and can share what’s happening in class.
- School Staff –
- School Counselor: helps with social skills, friendships, and short-term support.
- School Psychologist: can assess for learning or attention difficulties, autism, and provide mental health support at school.
- Special Education Team: supports if your child may qualify for an IEP or 504 plan.
- School Counselor: helps with social skills, friendships, and short-term support.
- Your Pediatrician – Rules out medical concerns (like hearing, vision, or sleep) and refers to specialists when needed.
- Licensed Educational Psychologist (LEP) – That’s where I come in! In California, LEPs specialize in assessments, counseling, and consultation. We bridge the gap between home and school, helping families understand their child’s strengths and needs.
- Community Mental Health Providers – Therapists (LMFTs, LCSWs, LPCCs, Psychologists) can work with kids and families on emotional well-being.
How Do You Ask for Help?
Here are a few steps to make the process smoother:
- Write down what you notice. Concrete examples (“She cries every morning before school” or “He avoids reading aloud”) help professionals understand your concerns.
- Start at school. Request a meeting with your child’s teacher, counselor, or school psychologist.
- Put it in writing if needed. In California, parents can make a written request for an evaluation if they believe their child may need special education support.
- Seek outside perspectives. If you want more answers or the school’s process feels slow, an LEP can provide an independent evaluation and guide you through next steps.
- Team up. Share information between the school, pediatrician, and specialists—kids benefit most when adults collaborate.
A Final Note for Parents
Asking for help doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. It means you’re looking out for your child’s future. With the right support, kids can learn to shine—whether that’s through extra strategies, new accommodations, or simply having a safe place to process big feelings.
As an LEP here in California, I’ve walked alongside many families as they take this step, and I can tell you: early support makes a world of difference. If you’re unsure where to begin, start with a conversation—you don’t need all the answers right now. You just need the courage to take the first step.
If you’d like guidance navigating school systems, evaluations, or finding resources, I’d be happy to help. That’s what I do as a Licensed Educational Psychologist: partner with families, uncover strengths, and create a clear plan forward.